Dear White People: 3 Tips For You To Keep My Son From Being Murdered By The Police & Karen

Please don't let the police murder my son
My 18-month-old twin son and me

Like many people, I’m pissed off about the senseless death of George Floyd. Today, in response to my frustration about not knowing how I can keep my Black son from getting senselessly murdered by the police, a white friend on Facebook asked me what she could do to help protect our children.

I thought about this and I have three tips for white people that could help my Black son and Black boys and men everywhere from being brutalized and murdered by the police.

I’m tired of crying

The post I shared that inspired the woman’s question was a teary-eyed reading of an article I wrote in 2015 in response to the senseless killing of Eric Garner. I hate that this video is evergreen content, but I keep sharing it because I don’t know what else to do.

I cried in this video, and I cried just now when I watched it again.

I cried like a baby the other day when I watched a video of a Black man on the ground with his hands behind his back, while the police had their guns drawn on him. And his 90-year-old grandmother came outside in her nightgown to keep the police from shooting him. All because he allegedly ran a stop sign. His grandma gets knocked to the ground while trying to protect her grandson, and this made me cry harder.

And I cried like a baby when I watched the brother of George Floyd cry during this CNN interview.

We scream, “Black Lives Matter,” but they simply don’t in this America.

I’m tired of crying. And I’m dreading “The talk” with my now 7-year-old son when he gets a little older.

I see a lot of Black moms on social media saying you have to pray differently for your Black son. I believe all things are possible with God, but I don’t believe prayers alone will be sufficient to keep our Black boys and Black men from being murdered by the police and Karen.

And since I know many Black people are doing all they can to solve the problem, that leads me back to what white people can do to be part of the solution.

Dear White People: 3 Tips For You To Keep My Son From Being Murdered By The Police & Karen #BlackLivesMatter #WhatDoITellMySon Click To Tweet

3 things white people can do to help

The most obvious thing white people can do is STOP CALLING THE POLICE ON BLACK PEOPLE FOR NO REASON. This solution is so obvious I don’t think it’s necessary to include in the list of three tips.

So, while not a comprehensive list, here are three things I think white people can do today to be part of the solution.

1. Teach your kids that Black people are human and our lives matter. Not our lives matter, too. But our lives matter.


White people, teach your kids Black history. Not the white-washed history they teach in school. If you need help, here is a long list of books you can buy on amazon.

2. In addition to books, you can buy Black dolls and Black action figures like Luke Cage and Black Panther for your kids.

This viral video of a white woman talking about why her daughter, Sophia, wanted a Black doll makes my point brilliantly. The white cashier told Sophia she should get a doll that looked like her instead, but Sophia set her straight.

“Love is love is love.”

3. Raise your kids to courageously stand up when they see injustice against a Black person. In the George Floyd video, I saw a Black person complaining to the police about what they saw. But Black people don’t have the same “privileges” as white people. So, maybe George Floyd would be alive today if one of those other white officers on the scene had a mother who taught her/him that Black people are human.

This third option makes me feel powerless, but I already feel powerless, and no amount of praying, or protesting, or electing Black presidents seems to make a difference. So, we need white people to do something when they see injustice against Black people. Yeah, I get it, the protesting and rioting in Minnesota caused the police officer to be arrested. That’s great. But I prefer an outcome where George Floyd didn’t die in the first place.

I’m crying, but I’m also angry

Perhaps these three tips will make a difference today, but I suspect it’s more of a long-term solution. So in the meantime, Black people have to protect ourselves and our families. This Instagram photo is a whole mood for me right now.

I feel powerless to keep the police from killing my son and other Black men unnecessarily. And I feel powerless to keep people like Amy Cooper from calling the police on me for no reason. But maybe if more Black people exercised our second amendment right and everyone knew there was a high likelihood we would do so, everyone-the police, the Amy Coopers, and all the Karens of the world would think twice before they stepped to us the wrong way.

If so, more Black lives would definitely be saved.

Because Black Lives Matter.

P.S., Vote for people who will help solve this problem.

Dear White People: 3 Tips For You To Keep My Son From Being Murdered By The Police & Karen #BlackLivesMatter #WhatDoITellMySon Click To Tweet


  1. James, you’re a beautiful writer. Though I don’t have my own kids, I know a lot of them. Your suggestions are spot on and one thing I know I can do is share your words and actions. Thank you!

      1. hello James,
        I am white and want nothing but peace between all races. I pray for God to unite us. Though I don’t have any Black friends I’ve done the best I can to teach my nephew (don’t have any kids of my own) the importance of black people, their culture, and that we need to respect all people, period. God wants us all to get along, and must like variety because look at our diversity. Have hope in us 🙂

        1. Hey Jasmine,

          Thanks for the note. Yep, lots of diversity out there. God bless and be well.

Comments are closed.